Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Hi and welcome to episode 2 of the I Walk Toronto podcast. I’m Lorrie. Thank you for listening.
Introduction
Love Me Till I’m Me Again
I’m recording this podcast on Christmas Day. Work has shut down for the holidays, so I’m missing my two hour walking commute, but I did get in a solid 90 minutes last night when I walked to the east end of the city for Christmas Eve dinner. As you can imagine, it was pretty quiet – not many people on the streets save for those who were running out to their own dinners, or people who don’t celebrate Christmas, heading out for Chinese or Japanese.
One thing I did see that made me stop and take a photo, is a piece of art in the front window of a store on Ossington. I’ve posted the picture on my website, iwalktoronto.ca and on my tumblr blog, iwalktoronto.tumbr.com. It’s a glowing neon sign that says Love Me Till I’m Me Again. I’m not sure when I first saw this piece of art – probably a few weeks ago, but it really made a big impact on me last night. I’ll talk about it more when I get to ‘What I’ve been thinking about’.
Truth be told, it was a pretty dreary walk along Queen Street to the east end of town. The only other thing of note was a fairly sizeable crowd in front of the Bay at Yonge and Queen, checking out the famous Christmas windows. Pretty remarkable and always worth a visit if you’re in the area over the holidays. If you have kids, definitely take them.
What I’m listening to
The thing that I’m listening to the most while I walk is Damian Abraham’s podcast, Turned Out A Punk. Now, if you don’t know who Damian is, he’s the motor-mouthed lead singer of one of my favourite bands, Fucked Up. If you’re at all interested in the history of music, punk or otherwise, and like to hear interesting stories from the guys who lived them, then I recommend it. The podcasts are long, so they’re perfect for a good walk.
Other than Turned Out A Punk, I’ve been listening to the odd Christmas song here and there. I have to make a confession. I’m a huge fan of Band Aid’s Do They Know It’s Christmas. Yes, I know that it’s a pretty cheesy song. Yes, I’m also aware that it’s extremely condescending to the entire African continent. And yes, Bono really does earnest to the point where you want to punch him in the throat, but what can I say? It’s a catchy tune.
Going back to Damian Abraham, Fucked Up did a cover of the song a few years back with people like Bob Mould, Teagan and Sara, Kevin Drew and a few other notable indie names, with the proceeds benefiting Indigenous Women’s groups. It’s worth checking out. If it’s your first time listening to Fucked Up, don’t let it colour your opinion, though. Check out some of their other work. For sure their album Chemistry of Common Life.
Oh, I forgot to mention the other Christmas song I like – U2’s cover of Baby, Please Come Home. That one always gets me, too.
What I’ve been thinking about
So what have I been thinking about while I’ve been walking?
Love Me Till I’m Me Again. I think the reason that piece of art sticks with me is that it perfectly describes how I’ve felt at various points over the year. When I was having a difficult time at work in the summer, I very much needed that support from my partner. When I didn’t get it, I realized that I was definitely not in the right relationship.
As I’ve moved through the fall and into the winter and I still haven’t felt like myself, I’ve relied on the warmth and generosity of my friends to help me through this period. People who will love me till I’m me again. Sometimes it’s been love me when I can’t even love myself.
Learning how to be alone when you’ve been in relationships for twenty plus years is hard work. It’s scary. But, the good days are starting to outnumber the bad. I look forward to being me again.
I’ve also been thinking a lot about seasonal depression. Days are short, the weather can be pretty dreary and the holidays have always kind of bummed me out. So I’m definitely a sufferer. I don’t know how bad, but I know that one of the main reasons why I left Vancouver is that I just couldn’t take the winters. Give me cold and clear over dark and rainy any day!
How am I getting through it? By talking. If there’s something I’ve learned over the last few months is that you don’t have to suffer alone. You might not be able to talk to all of your friends about what you’re going through, but almost everyone has someone. Take them for coffee, or a beer, or a walk and just start talking.
The other methods I use are keeping active and having things to look forward to. I’m supposed to be training for a half marathon in Berlin at the end of March. Ticket and entry are paid for. But, I’ve got tendonitis in both feet and I haven’t been able to run in more than a week. Instead of letting this add to my depression, I’m finding other things to do. Like this podcast. Getting outside and doing things. Writing. Walking. Being with people.
I’ve also been buying tickets to shows for 2015. The Vaselines. Sleater-Kinney and Jose Gonzalez. I recommend them all, and you can find them on Soundcloud. Check them out and if you like them head over to iTunes, or better yet your local record store.
I’d also love to be able to sneak in a trip to South by Southwest before I head to Berlin in March, but I don’t think it’s on the cards this year.
Tips on staying warm over the winter
Now, here’s how I’ve been keeping warm during my walks. Staying warm in the winter when you’re a die-hard walker can be tough. So far this winter hasn’t been as cold as last, so that’s been good, but I have invested in a new Patagonia winter coat that’s been keeping me toasty. On the colder days I’ve been adding a Permaloft shirt and a sweater and mitts instead of gloves. Also, I’ve seem to have lost my gloves somewhere, so I should have a look for them at some point. I hate losing things, but I’m not really sure they’re lost, just misplaced.
Winter boots are something I haven’t really been wearing, only in the snow. I have a pair of hand-me-downs, but they’re a bit small. And, with my foot being the way it is, I’ve been sticking to sneakers. Adidas, of course.
If you’re going to commit to walking in the winter, a proper winter coat and some quality layers are essential. Spend some time at MEC and get sorted out. The quote I live by is there’s no such thing as bad weather, just bad gear. I’m sure an English guy came up with that one.
Closing thoughts
Well, that’s about it for this episode. Thankfully, we’re almost through the holidays and life can return back to normal.
I want to thank Jen and Ian for having me over for Christmas Eve dinner. And drinks. And Monopoly. I want to thank Damian Abraham for being the inspiration behind this podcast – as he says, get out there and create your own culture. And, I would like to thank the people who have been kind enough to listen to me and offer advice and buy me lunch and hang out when I needed someone to hang out with.
Thanks for listening. If you want to get in touch, you can send me an email to iwalktoronto@gmail.com. Or follow me on twitter @iwalktoronto. The Facebook group, if you want to join, is iwalktoronto – one word. As is my instagram account. I’ve started a blog to host the podcast, which is iwalktoronto.ca. And you can subscribe to the podcast on iTunes – search for I Walk Toronto, this time three words. If you enjoyed it, please rate the episode.
Thanks again.
Bye for now, and remember, be awesome.
Leave a Reply